August 2010: This was the month I was supposed to head off to college. How I longed to start this next chapter of my life. God had different plans though. Instead of packing up for college, I sat in the hospital with a mask, gown, and gloves on only to sit and watch my helpless Mother lie there with no immune system. She had several blood clots throughout her body, and could do nothing but throw up all the time. I can’t stress how awful it was to see her like that. The tears I shed were innumerable. On August 5th I suddenly became very sick, and wasn’t allowed in the hospital to be with Mom. That was a very difficult time for me. I would just lie in bed with nothing to do but let my mind race back and forth trying to figure out if what was happening to my family was real. I spent a lot of time in prayer just begging God for a miracle. If we could’ve at least gotten her up to Cleveland to get the transplant started, then maybe we would see progress. Waiting was by far the most excruciating part of the whole trial. But on August 9th God answered my prayer. Cleveland Clinic had found a match!!! What a relief it was to hear that news! Finally after 4 months they were able to find a donor to give Mom the transplant she needed to save her life! After the doctors told us the good news, they set up a consultation to go over everything with us for August 19th.
Mom was released from the hospital on the 13th to come home, and was just put on blood thinners to reduce the blood clots in her chest and arms. I was feeling a lot better too, so we decided that all four of us would go up to Cleveland together. When we arrived I was immediately overwhelmed at the size of the hospital. It was huge!! I remember walking around in amazement to how nice everything was. We were a little early that day, so we decided to grab some lunch at this little café that, little did I know, would become an everyday place to eat. As we all sat around and ate, you could see the look of anxiousness rush all across Mom’s face. Who wouldn’t be nervous though? When we finally got to sit down with the doctor he began to tell us how things would run, and the different negatives and positives. It was still so hard to believe that we were even having that conversation. Everything was all set though. The doctor wanted Mom to come back on the 30th for pre-testing. They had about 13 tests lined up to make sure her body was well enough to start the transplant, and after that they could get started.
As soon as we left the hospital, we headed straight for the Amish Country. That is one place I had always wanted to go, and we wanted to do something together as a family before Mom was admitted to the hospital again. She cried the whole way there. I felt so bad for her. Her nerves were such a mess from meeting with the doctor, and she just didn’t want to have to go through that. We rode in silence most of the way there. I prayed that God would just comfort her, and we would be able to enjoy that time together when we got there. It turned out to be such a nice trip too. Our hotel was gorgeous, and we had a balcony that overlooked the country. This one night Mom and I snuck over to one of the restaurants to get our favorite pie! It was such a special time. She didn’t have the strength to walk across the street, but she did it anyhow. Thinking back on certain times like that makes me think that Mom just knew she wouldn’t make it. I never had peace about it, and I think she knew that too. We had many talks about Heaven, and what things she wanted at her funeral. The picture above is my favorite of her. We had gone out to eat at this one restaurant, and she ordered steak. She was so excited! I recall so vividly her sitting there talking about how long it had been since she had one. It’s amazing the little things we take for granted like that. There’s so much more I could share with you about that trip, but I just can’t bring myself to let it out quite yet. There are just some memories you want to keep for yourself, and I think I’ll hold on to them for now. After we arrived back home it seemed that in the blink of an eye it was time for Mom to head back up to Cleveland again. This time only Mom and Dad went up while Caleb and I stayed behind. This is where reality sets in and the real journey begins…..
